I'm Reinhardt Jobse, and I’m here to inspire and empower
people to improve the quality of their efforts through coaching, training, and
connecting them with helpful solutions they need so they can realise their
ambitions and thrive!
Life is a wonderful gift, but it is also a challenging
journey that requires us to learn and grow continuously.
I know how challenging life can be. I've been around the
block and still doing it. At one time I owned a coffee shop. But then I lost
everything. I burned out, closed the coffee shop, went bankrupt, my
relationships fell apart, and I was left with nothing but debt and despair.
But then, after a lonely journey of almost a decade I found
something that changed my life: fulfilment coaching.
Coaching is about more than just helping you change your
habits so you can transform your results and reach your goals. It’s about
helping you live a joyful, meaningful, and fulfilled life where you can realise
your ambitions and thrive.
And that's what I want to help you do.
I want to help you achieve your goals without burning
yourself out. I want to help you overcome your fears and challenges. I want to
help you create a positive impact in the world. I want to help you improve the
quality of your efforts so you can realise your ambitions and thrive.
That's why I became a fulfilment coach. I have almost two
decades of experience in the hospitality industry and now as an accredited coach
I am helping determined people like you live fulfilled lives, make meaningful
connections, build exceptional relationships, develop, and grow.
And I believe that you have what it takes to do that.
So let me ask you this:
• Are you ready to take your business or career - your life - to the next level?
• Are you ready to connect with amazing people who can help you grow?
• Are you ready to create a better future for yourself and those around you?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, then I want
to work with you.
Let's have a coffee and see how we can collaborate to make
your dreams a reality.
Let’s connect and make big things happen together!
Communication is vital for success in life and work. But sometimes, we avoid saying what needs to be said because we are afraid or unsure. What is the cost of not speaking up? What problems could we prevent or solve if we had the courage to say what we think and feel?
In this blog post, I will explore some of the things that are not being said right now that need to be said, and how saying them can benefit us and others. I will also share some tips and strategies on how to say what needs to be said in a respectful and constructive way.
There are many reasons why we don’t say what needs to be said. Some of them are:
Fear of rejection, criticism, conflict, or consequences.
Lack of confidence, clarity, or skill.
Uncertainty about the outcome or impact.
Discomfort with the topic or the person.
Respect for privacy, boundaries, or norms.
Desire to avoid hurting someone’s feelings or damaging a relationship.
These reasons are understandable and valid. However, they can also prevent us from expressing ourselves authentically and effectively. They can also create misunderstandings, resentment, frustration, confusion, or missed opportunities.
I think there are many things that are not being said right now that need to be said. Things that could improve our performance, relationships, self-esteem, social impact, and personal growth. Things like:
How we feel about our work, our colleagues, our bosses, our clients, our projects, our goals, our challenges, our achievements.
How we feel about our family, our friends, our partners, our children, our parents, our siblings, our relatives.
How we feel about ourselves, our strengths, our weaknesses, our passions, our dreams, our fears, our hopes.
How we feel about the issues that matter to us, such as politics, religion, social justice, environment, education, health, culture, etc.
How we feel about the feedback we receive or give, the praise we get or offer, the criticism we face or deliver.
How we feel about the conflicts we encounter or cause, the misunderstandings we experience or create, the disagreements we have or initiate.
These are just some examples of things that are not being said right now that need to be said. Of course, there are many more. And of course, saying these things is not easy. It requires courage and skill. But it is worth it.
By saying what needs to be said:
We can communicate effectively and authentically. We can express our thoughts and feelings clearly and honestly. We can avoid ambiguity and confusion. We can make ourselves understood and respected.
We can understand and respect others and ourselves. We can listen to others’ perspectives and opinions. We can empathize with their emotions and experiences. We can appreciate their strengths and contributions. We can acknowledge their weaknesses and challenges.
We can contribute to positive change and social impact. We can raise awareness and inspire action on the issues that matter to us. We can challenge the status quo and advocate for justice and equality. We can support and empower others who share our vision and values.
We can prevent or resolve conflicts and problems. We can address the root causes and not just the symptoms. We can find solutions that work for everyone involved. We can repair broken trust and restore harmony.
We can learn and grow as individuals and as a collective. We can gain new insights and perspectives. We can discover new opportunities and possibilities. We can develop new skills and competencies. We can improve our performance and productivity.
Saying what needs to be said is not just about what we say but also how we say it. Here are some tips and strategies on how to say what needs to be said in a respectful and constructive way:
Know your purpose and intention. Before you say anything, ask yourself: Why do I want to say this? What do I hope to achieve by saying this? How will this benefit me or others? Be clear about your goal and motivation.
Choose the right time and place. Timing and context are important factors in communication. Choose a time when you and the other person are calm and focused. Choose a place where you have privacy and minimal distractions. Avoid saying something when you are angry or emotional.
Use “I” statements instead of “you” statements. “I” statements express your own thoughts and feelings without blaming or accusing the other person. “You” statements imply criticism or judgment of the other person’s behaviour or character. For example: “I feel hurt when you don’t listen to me” instead of “You never listen to me”.
Be specific and factual instead of vague and general. Specific and factual statements provide concrete examples and evidence of what you are saying. Vague and general statements can be interpreted in different ways and can lead to misunderstandings. For example: “I noticed that you missed the deadline for the report” instead of “You are always late”.
Use positive and constructive language instead of negative and destructive language. Positive and constructive language focuses on the desired outcome and the possible solutions. Negative and destructive language focuses on the problem and the blame. For example: “How can we improve our communication?” instead of “You have a communication problem”.
Listen actively and empathetically. Listening is as important as speaking in communication. Listening actively means paying attention to what the other person is saying, without interrupting or judging. Listening empathetically means trying to understand the other person’s point of view, feelings, and needs, without agreeing or disagreeing.
Seek feedback and clarification. Feedback and clarification are essential for ensuring that your message is received and understood correctly. Seek feedback by asking the other person to repeat or summarize what you said, or by asking them how they feel or what they think about what you said. Seek clarification by asking questions or paraphrasing what the other person said, or by asking them to explain or elaborate on what they said.
Acknowledge and appreciate. Acknowledgment and appreciation are powerful ways to build rapport and trust with the other person. Acknowledge the other person’s thoughts and feelings, even if you don’t agree with them. Appreciate the other person’s efforts and contributions, even if they are not perfect.
Communication is vital for success in life and work. But sometimes, we avoid saying what needs to be said because we are afraid or unsure. However, there are many things that are not being said right now that need to be said and saying them can benefit us and others in many ways.
Saying what needs to be said is not easy, but it is possible. By following some tips and strategies, we can say what needs to be said in a respectful and constructive way.
So, let’s say what needs to be said.
Let’s say it with courage and kindness.
Let’s say it with clarity and compassion.
Let’s say it with intention and integrity.
And let’s see what happens when we do.